dear lucy.

dear lucy,

oh sweet pea, where do i start?

lucy, your favorite thing these days is talk on the phone. i love it so much. you put your hand up to your ear and say “hi!” you also do it with my phone, remotes, or play phones. “hi” is by far your most favorite word. you say it whenever you hear the front door open. you do the same when you hear the click of the gate in the hallway. i saw a shirt at target the other day that had a conversation bubble with the word “hi” in the center. that is so you. i think you might be a social butterfly, lulu.

we have lots of nicknames for you: lulu is probably top on the list. there’s also lu, queen bee, lucy goosey, and lucy bear. jude always calls you louie.

you recently decided to give up bottles which makes my life easier. you drink from a cup like a big girl.

i can’t believe you are almost one. it makes me sad to see you grow, in a weird way. its fun and exciting, but i want you to always be my little baby girl. i feel the same way with jude. you will understand that someday, lu. whenever i think of you growing i recall our time in the hospital. it was so perfect. we had plenty of alone time to get to know each other. i couldn’t stop looking at you…your jet black, spiky hair and dark skin. you were my tiny papoose. you have grown into a little girl now and it doesn’t seem possible.

i love your toothy, squinty, squished up nose smile. i love your round face and your big brown eyes. i love your chubby toes and chubbier thighs. you have the best disposition of any baby i’ve ever been around, and i’m not just saying that because you are mine.

you are my reason for living, lucy bear. i always had big dreams and plans for my life. that all changed when i became a mom. i never considered motherhood to be my purpose in life. but i was wrong. god has shown me that the most important thing i will ever do is raise you and jude; to teach you how to be strong, independent, loving people who make good choices and serve the lord. every night i pray over you as you sleep. i pray that you will grow up to love god, make good choices, and live a long life.

i think you will be smart, lucy. you are definitely more of a free spirit than your brother, but i think you will be smart too. i can already see your memory at work.

i always wonder what you will be like when you get older. i think you will be unique and quirky. you will be cool, obviously. i hope you dance, like i used to. and i’d love for you to play guitar, like daddy does. i think you will make a difference in the world, lucy. in fact, i know that you will. god has big plans for you…i don’t doubt it for a second.

i love you through and through. yesterday, today, and tomorrow too.

love,

mama

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