dear jude.

dear jude,

the weather has been great the last few days. its been good for our sanity. on the days that i’m home, we usually go to the park in the morning with a picnic lunch. we stay for a while and head home for nap. in the car you tell me about how hungry you are, even though you’ve already eaten your entire lunch. so sometimes i send you to nap with a little snack in order to prevent a major freak out.

you just LOVE to be outside. i love it, too. aunt holly bought you a lightning mcqueen bike. you are such a proud owner. its red, your favorite color. you aren’t great at peddling yet, but we are working on it. you look so cute and old on that bike.

jude, you’re growing up right before my eyes.

you’re all signed up for preschool. school starts in september and it’s only two mornings a week. it doesn’t seem possible. i am excited for you because i know you will love it. i’m nervous, of course.

you started going to the bathroom all by yourself. you don’t need any help from me because you pee standing up now. one day, you told me you had to pee. you said, “but i want to try to go all by myself.” so i let you. a minute later, i peeked my head around the bathroom door and there you stood, trying to figure it out. i showed you how to lift the seat up. and from then on you’ve been a pro! i was so proud of you, jude. i told you that you peed just like a man. the next morning, you were laying in bed with daddy and i. you mentioned something about peeing. then you looked up at me with those huge brown eyes and that funny look. you said, “mom, am i a boy or a man?” jude, i just love how that mind works! it intrigues me.

you always say, “i’ll be very be careful.” and you usually are. i appreciate your cautiousness.

oh, another thing about going outside. you’re obsessed with running! you’d probably call it racing. a couple weeks ago, daddy wanted to go for a run. so we put you and lulu in the stroller and i pushed you guys while he ran ahead. you soon got sick of riding. i got you out and off you ran. you’re very careful to stay on the side of the road, which makes me glad. you took off. you ran nearly to the end of our street and back to our house. you love it! so now you always want to go running.

you’re such a boss. one morning, you were doing some racing with your cars and ramp. you asked if i wanted to play so i said yes. i sat next to you and started to ask a question about your cars. you quickly stopped me and said, “don’t talk during my race!”

yesterday, you were singing and dancing to some music. you told me to dance too, so i did. as soon as i started to join in you said, “nevermind, don’t dance mama!” i guess you don’t like my moves. they are good moves though, don’t forget that.

i had to leave the other night to run an errand. i told you goodbye and headed to the car. i sat down and turned the key. i looked up and saw you standing in the door, in your undies and a t-shirt, yelling “mama! i need a hug and a kiss!” that melted my heart right then and there.

jude, i seriously love you so much.

you’ve been super challenging the last couple months. its been really, really hard on me. its so tiring. but i’m hopeful that this stage will end soon and i look forward to that.

you are my pride, jude. no matter how challenging you get, i will always love you. you are my son, my firstborn, my intelligent little man. you are loved. so, so loved.



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