dear jude.

dear jude,

ohhhhh, my little man. wow, have these last few weeks been challenging. i don’t know how to explain it, jude. you are the cutest, smartest, funniest handsome dude ever. we have so much fun together. when you are happy and in a good mood, life is wonderful. you are creative and crazy and you make me laugh. but in that moment when you cross a line or get rude or are told what to do…look out, world. you lose your mind.

i think my challenges with you all stem back to a few issues. the first is that i’m not just any old mom who let’s their kids get away with things. i’m not going to put up with you grabbing toys from lucy or talking back or pretending to hit. i just won’t let that stuff slide. so obviously we are going to have battles. but i’m willing to fight those battles if it will help you learn what to do and what not to do.

another issue is that you are just way too smart for your own good. for real, jude. you are far beyond your years when it comes to intelligence. i am glad because being smart will get you far. but it can also get you into trouble.

but, like i tell you, i will love you to infinity no matter what.

the other night you were giving me a hard time about going to bed. you were in your room freaking out, so i went in to ask you what was wrong. you said, “mom, this friggin’ bed is driving me crazy.” you say “friggin'” every now and then. as much as i know you probably shouldn’t be saying that, i can’t help but laugh. daddy and i try not to say it, but i think it was burned in your brain since the whole “friggin’ life jacket” incident. as i was fixing your bed you said, “this is seriously ridiculous.”

yesterday morning you and i were downstairs. the monitor was on because lucy was taking her morning nap. we heard her wake up and you ran up to greet her. i was still downstairs and was unloading the dishwasher. i left the monitor on and i could hear you whispering to her. you said a bunch of stuff that i couldn’t make out, but then i heard you say, “lucy, sometimes you’re going to grow up to be a bigger girl.” i got all teary eyed, it was the sweetest thing.

daddy was recently looking for something on t.v. you asked about a show and said, “do they have that on time warner cable?” we cracked up. we don’t have cable. when i asked where you heard it you said, “i have no clue.”

at the park today you told me, “mom, you’re really smart. and i’m cool.” you have this where you think that boys are cool and awesome and girls are pretty. if i ever tell lucy that she is awesome you say, “no, she’s pretty and i’m awesome.”

jude, you are getting SO BIG. i just can’t believe it. you are in 4t size clothes and it blows my mind.

as frustrating as this age is for me, i love it at the same time because you always have me laughing.

you’re so much better these days when it comes to playing with others. there was a time when i was kind of worried: you’d act annoyed with other kids and didn’t really want to socialize. but you’re over that now. you still like playing alone, but you always make friends at the park and you and bella are getting along so well. lydiah came over the other day and you were so pumped the entire time. you made friends at papa and gramma’s church that you talk about a lot. i’m so glad.

jfk, you’re the best.

love you!


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