dear jude.

dear jude,

you amaze me. honestly and truly…you do. you are SO smart, it blows my mind. you are kind and sensitive. you are a tenderhearted boy and i couldn’t be more proud. you feel your emotions HARD. very hard. and that can be challenging to you and me and everyone around you, but we are figuring that out.

you love to listen and to be listened to. in fact, when you are trying to speak to someone and they aren’t listening, it upsets you. i get that. that’s something that frustrates me as well. when i observe you, i watch to see that others are listening and when they aren’t it annoys me, because you are so worth listening to! you crave a good, thought out response and you deserve it, too.

jude, your mind is like a sponge that never leaks. you soak everything in and lock it away, remembering it all. that can be good and bad, i suppose. i have to be on my toes at all times, mindful of what i say. but i like that about you.

i know it sounds cliche or sappy, but you remind me so much of my dad, your bampy. it’s UNCANNY! many people say so. your memory is on point, just like his. you have a clever way of solving math equations and you memorize bible verses in no time at all. you are tall and wiry with bushy hair. i’m glad you are like bampy. it’s good for the family. i see you in him and that’s special.

jude, you have the most AMAZING eyes! the shape is just gorgeous. you are handsome.

you love to play ninja turtles and star wars. there are two things that you take EVERYWHERE: either your light saber or your ninja turtles gear (mask and sword). your imagination is infinite. you don’t care who is watching and you do your ninja/fighting moves all over the playground. it makes me happy to see you so carefree. sometimes you can be uptight and nervous, but not all the time, and i love that.

i love to laugh with you. in the car yesterday lucy had the biggest scream fest of her entire life. you and i just looked at each other and burst into laughter, which of course made her even more upset, but we couldn’t help it.

you give the best hugs! you’re a huge hugger. and believe me, i will always hug you, no matter what age…i’ll never stop!

you and lucy have become fast friends with the kids next door, luke and lillie. it’s so great having best friends as neighbors! i always wanted that for you, because i had that as a kid and it was awesome. you, lucy, luke and lillie play outside for hours on end and you get along very well. it’s great and makes summer even better for you.

gramma and papa bought a camp in april. we have had a blast there and have gone nearly every weekend since. you love camp. you and lucy play on the dock all day long. we fish, eat, go for boat rides, and explore nature. it’s a little slice of heaven. we all went there on the 4th of july. at night, the men gave us a fireworks show. we had some leftover and you said, “i think we should save the rest for the fall because i start kindergarten in the fall!”

so yeah, you start kindergarten on september 1. i’ve struggled big time, off and on, since you turned 5. kindergarten is a huge step. i’m excited for you. i’m sad, too. its new territory for me. i love you so insanely much, it’s really unreal. but we’ll navigate this world together, our family and jesus, and i have nothing but confidence that you’ll grow to be even more amazing than you are right now.



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